‘Twas the Beer Before Christmas

‘Twas two months before Christmas when all through Berlin
Signs of holidays were stirring, stores filled with Stollen

Christmas Markets were coming, how I looked forward to so
‘Cept the freaking noisy one being built outside my window

Only one market I’d ever been, Strasbourg in east France
With visions of sugarplums. Wait, how do sugarplums dance?
Amidst the revelry I saw, a man wave with great cheer
To his pub for heavy German food and something called Christmas Beer

I, in my wonder, had never heard of this fare
I like beer, I like Christmas, and he seemed a nice Herr
The beer arrived fast, it was dark and quite strong
Spicy and rich, how could I go wrong

But back to Berlin, as I often digress
Brevity no strong suit, for which I confess
As I said ’twas October, I met a friend for a drink
A small pub where the owner gave a smile and a wink

His elf-like expression as he approached us parched two
Christmas beer just arrived he said, why what else could we do
The taste a bit nutty, smooth and yet crisp
Down went the first, then the second in a wisp

As I left I could hear, the man let out a “ho”
But drunk on two beers, what the hell did I know
I looked for the name, but there was none in sight
Off I stumbled in the cold October night

Now late November, ’twas Christmas market time
With bratwurts, and mandelin, and lots of Glühwein
Revelry and fun, coming afar and from near
But alas I could find not a one Christmas beer

The plans they were made to meet back at same place
But when I arrived, I did an about face
Pouring rain I did search, but to no avail
What the heck (keep this clean), could this night be a fail?

No sign it had been, no sign that it was
Yes beer was quite strong, but I had just a buzz
I swear this was true, not a story invented
Sometimes I may be strange, but hardly demented

Not this street, not that, not a Platz or a Strasse
The place didn’t show on my valued Google maps(e)
Who was this elf-like man who appeared for one night
The last gasp of a business or a holiday sprite?

While forever it may be that this stays a strange mystery
As another holiday season is about to become history
So forever lore, the case of the missing Christmas Beer
Merry Christmas to all and a Happy New Year!